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10 Uses For the "Holy Bible" |
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 Q:Why does God prefer Virgins? A:The tight Pussy |
3 Little Christians and Christ Three Christians were sitting in a bar watching the gospel chanel, when the Lord walks in. The three men bow before him as he walks past, takes a seat, and orders a bloody mary. The first man looks up and asks " God, what brings you to this small piece of land?" God does not turn around but replies, "The High grade pot and fine bitches." The second man stands up and says, "God, is there anything I may offer you?" God does not turn around but says, " You already buy my drinks everytime you donate money to the church, but if you dont mind taking this drink to that fine hunny over there." The third man stands up and says," God, your suppose to be the almighty Holy one, what are you thinking, dont you read the bible?" God finally turns around and looks at the man and replies, "I made the hunnies with the ass and tities, I made the marajuana plants, I made the condaments that make this drink, and you support my habit every time you go to church or buy a bible, Im just enjoying my work. Besides, the bible was made for rolling papers, what have you people been using it for?" |
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 Child Corruption: True Story Me and a friend were walking down the street when we saw a box of sidewalk chalk laying in the childrens yard near the street of whom I babysit for. We were joking around and decided to play a pracktical joke and draw a anarchy sign and satanic pentacle in the street. My friend complimented it with a beautiful Hail Satan 666. As we were walking up the street we decided to go back and erase it before the little kids saw it. As we were getting closer to the area, we saw the kids playing in the street. I had a can of pepsi in my hands , so I began to erase it. Once finished we continued to walk to my house. As we got closer we noticed the kids had copied our work. The 6 year old girl look at me and said, Dena....What does Hail Sara mean? |
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